cygnoir.net

cygnoir.net

little box of money

Princess Obvious makes an announcement: weddings are expensive.

They are not the kind of expensive that makes me want to save up my money and splurge eventually. They are the kind of expensive that makes me count how many Apple products we could be buying with this unheard-of sum, and then quote that number at inopportune moments.

“Two.” “Two?” “Two iMacs. That ALONE is going to cost us TWO IMACS.”
But the sum has been heard, many times before, and will continue to be heard as long as we as humans consider this tradition an important part of our culture. I know I can’t think of these numbers in daily-life terms.

The difficulty I am having, I have pinpointed, is feeling like I am worth the fuss of something this expensive.

Not that I think I’m worthless, no! But perhaps I am worth just a little box of money, not a big one. Money has always been a complex emotional subject for me, and the wedding is throwing it into sharp relief. I have to get over it soon, or the next eleven months are going to be much more difficult than they need to be.

← An IndieWeb Webring πŸ•ΈπŸ’ β†’

I acknowledge that I live and work on stolen Cowlitz, Clackamas, Atfalati, and Kalapuya land.
I give respect and reverence to those who came before me.

∞