single white metaphor seeks same

The headache broke with a carnival of mucus, which normally I wouldn’t write about because, hey, gross, but I need to remind myself for next time: it’s just a sinus headache, self! You do not have a brain tumor!

Today I have another health development to report: hives. I have itchy, scratchy welts all over my arms and neck. What? You wanna bring it, thirty-mumble? You wanna give me sinus headaches and hives and some weird eye-twitchy thing? Well, okay, then. Insert empty threat against a meaningless construct here. And a tiny fist shake for good measure.

My mobile informed me of new voicemail 5 hours after the fact, which stretches the definition of “new” a bit, or really turns it into saltwater taffy and jumps rope with it. So I’ve got Twitter telling me when even my least closest friend has the hiccoughs, and my own piece of always-on mobile technology can’t even be bothered to ring when my flatmate calls.

Please, universe, make it a little harder for me to find a metaphor. Just a little. S’all I ask.

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I acknowledge that I live and work on stolen Cowlitz, Clackamas, Atfalati, and Kalapuya land.
I give respect and reverence to those who came before me.