I’m at a loss tonight. Everything I write seems small and boring. I had a good weekend. I am worried about my mom. My job is ever more stressful. I hate the length of my hair. I spent good quality time with Chad on Sunday, watching DVDs. New contact lenses are waiting for me to pick them up. I have a library software conference to attend this weekend, and two TMBG concerts. Online social things are annoying me to the point of distraction. I sleep to combat loneliness sometimes. I finished White Noise by Don DeLillo, finding it incredibly depressing yet amusing, and stylistically elegant. I thought about going to church for Easter, but didn’t. “Six Feet Under” has a great first episode, and the rest of the first season is now in my Netflix queue. I should use my iPod more, but I lost my nice headphones and the earbuds don’t fit in my weird little ears. Someone wrote me email from Russia tonight but I can’t decipher it, even though it’s in English. I started reading Ken MacLeod’s The Cassini Division because I need more science fiction in my life. I like eating Nutella from the jar, with a teaspoon. Tea before bed used to be my favorite ritual, but I haven’t had it in a while. 5-HTP has little effect on my mood thus far, but seems to make me remember all of my (happier) dreams in greater detail. I’m frustrated with my Sims because they ruin every party I throw them by going to bed just when things get going. I listen to NPR and wonder when we will all agree the world is ending. Is the world ending? A little each day, perhaps. And all I can write about are the small and boring details. Good night.