cygnoir.net

cygnoir.net

groundhog day

It is the same workday, over and over. I write the same email, talk to the same people, wrestle unsuccessfully with the same bullshit issues.

I am coming in later and later and I know that’s no good, but how the hell do I get myself out of bed for a job that has become not only unfulfilling but actively antagonizing?

I wanted to stick it out here for the next year, before I go away to graduate school, but I’m wondering if I should even do that. I won’t get a raise – the school doesn’t do that – no matter how well I do or how long I stay here. So why am I here again?

… okay, it’s for the people. I love my coworkers.

And that’s it.

I’m performing a wedding in December, and meeting the bride and groom in person tonight. I would say I’m looking forward to it, but I’m not sure how to look forward to things anymore. They all seem so far away. Grad School, the big Thing To Look Forward To, isn’t until fall of 2003. That is so far away it sounds like a country I’ve never even heard of.

Ah well. At least I have a passport.

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I acknowledge that I live and work on stolen Cowlitz, Clackamas, Atfalati, and Kalapuya land.
I give respect and reverence to those who came before me.

∞