cygnoir.net

cygnoir.net

to under by impatiently at

i am tired. my brain hurts. these are inaccurate statements.

i am drinking work coffee. somewhere behind my left eye-socket hurts. these are fairly accurate statements.

i am frustrated with communicating. i am confused about where to go. these are accurate but vague statements.

if i had to diagram myself as a sentence, i would be all prepositions, propositions. means to ends, not ends of sentences.

no, wait. there would be an adverb. “impatiently” would be the adverb. it suits my sentence, which now looks like this:

to under by impatiently at

and i am quite fond of how it sounds. there is at least once person who cringes daily at my liberties with the english language, the non-american style of quotation marks, the punctuation, the lack of capitalization. but she must like how it sounds. she’s always liked how it sounded. (hi to you, my favorite unnamed grammar-nazi.)

i should not divulge more than i am comfortable discussing. simplification, not oversimplification, is what is called for. i worried about the latter in my life because there is where i slip through the cracks. i am too many details. i am the third meanings of words, the ones you don’t bother to read because you’ve already confirmed that you’re using the word correctly with the first two definitions.

i am the italicized archaic form.

i am italics. i am a font. i am a letter. which letter would i be? i would be X for eXpansive and eXtravagant, or for seXy and leXicon. or i would be useful in ticcing the tac, in checking the map, in marking the spot, in signing the doc.

o, doc, i feel sick. somewhere behind my left eye-socket hurts. cut back on the work coffee. i can’t. i’m too tired. my brain hurts. tell me where to go to get better. tell me where to go next. diagram the sentence. which sentence? your sentence. five to fifteen? the other one. “to under by impatiently at.” there’s nothing to diagram. there’s nothing to take apart. there’s no content, no meaning. keep reading. what, the third meaning? the italicized archaic form? keep going. after the third? where else? where else do i go? keep going.keep going.

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I acknowledge that I live and work on stolen Cowlitz, Clackamas, Atfalati, and Kalapuya land.
I give respect and reverence to those who came before me.

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