cygnoir.net

cygnoir.net

melt

my brain melts when i watch television. i can feel it seeping out of my ears. sick in bed today i watched about a billion episodes of “a wedding story” on the learning channel. major brain-seep. although i am a total sap and love watching people tell the stories of how they met and fell in love and decided to get married. i definitely don’t believe that marriage should be an integral part in all long-term relationships, but since i am married i can relate to wanting to express a commitment in that way. it’s a choice, like having children, or buying a house, although of course all three things are very different expressions and experiences. the point is, we have these choices now. women are no longer “destined” to marry and to procreate to maintain their position in society. granted, some prejudices still exist – i still get the “o, you’ll change your mind” reply (complete with condescending smile) when i say that chad and i have decided not to have children. we can be married without wanting to have kids, i say, but many people still don’t get it, or if they do, are disappointed in us somehow.

it used to bother me a lot more than it does now. now i just smile condescendingly back because i know something they don’t know: i know how happy we are together and with the choice we’ve made.

i like romance. i also like being married. still, my brain feels melted. maybe that’s just the dayquil.

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I acknowledge that I live and work on stolen Cowlitz, Clackamas, Atfalati, and Kalapuya land.
I give respect and reverence to those who came before me.

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