soon, soon

i was in a bad mood earlier. well, it wasn’t an official bad mood, more like three steps away from a bad mood. if i had taken those three steps, it would have sucked, because i have to be at least marginally entertaining at dinner tonight.

then i went to lunch with the gang and cheered up quite a bit. something shifted in that dynamic; we have added a new person to the mix, and i think her influence has been entirely beneficial. or maybe i just stopped worrying about it so much, since i can opt out at any time. this doesn’t mean i don’t get uncomfortable anymore when people start talking about getting totally wrecked on alcohol or drugs. i still do. it’s more of a passive emotion now, though.

the rest of the afternoon has been fine. half of me is anticipating the weekend and the other half wants to remain in this moment for a little while, because from here i can see the whole weekend in front of me, these precious things …

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I acknowledge that I live and work on stolen Cowlitz, Clackamas, Atfalati, and Kalapuya land.
I give respect and reverence to those who came before me.